Saturday, December 4, 2010

Volunteering for Stupid

“Tell me AGAIN why you want me to take off work to serve my child pizza in the school cafeteria? No, no…it is not that I did not hear you the first time, I am just HOPING there is SANE reason such as the union lunch workers are on strike.” I hissed into the phone at an Ubermom who is shocked I would not want to “treat” the children to “a restaurant day” at school.

And for me…this is the thing about volunteering at the schools—most of the events we are asked to volunteer for are criminally idiotic. And although I like this week’s New York Time piece—“Frazzled Moms Push Back Against Volunteering” they did not mention the REAL problem--the vast increase in number of these dim-witted celebrations. This craziness is what moms should REALLY be fighting against. Remember the day when we had class mothers and we had 3 or 4 holiday parties a year—the last two periods before the end of the day…and the bigger events happened in High School—why? Because the kids could plan the parties themselves in High School.

Although I feel terribly guilty about not helping with the Science Garden at the elementary school—I have no compunction telling the zealous mom organizing Beanie Baby bingo that “if I wanted my child to grow-up white trash I would save some money and move even FURTHER upstate.” Or the chubster mom who came up with the idea of Ice Cream Day—“Are you trying to kill our children—have you seen all these pudgy kids wandering the halls?!!”

I have refused to participate in any number of brainless follies…just on principle and I have never felt guilty. Even though the Times article mentions school events with titles that scream stupid like “Donuts for Dad Day” and “Movie Night” —not a word. The mindset of the moms needs to change to: “I do not want to volunteer for another mind numbing event AND I do NOT want my kid participating in yet another event which glorifies either overeating or getting more stuff.

We have to stop the madness. If someone comes up with a dumb event idea—just say NO.


Proud Procrastinator said...

You are my hero. While I steered clear of events like restaurant day (don't we serve them enough OUTSIDE of school) I got sucked in by utopian visions of children gorging on vegetables of their own creation, only to be slammed back into reality by the district maintenance dude screaming at me for not clearing the last of the 5 tons of weeds us sucker parents cleared on one of our precious saturdays, in time for the a visit by the superintendant. I still didn't read the times article but I'm putting it on my short list.

my you have been prolific.

LazyMom said...

Hey! Thanks! I still feel the Science garden is such a cool idea--if I were more organized I WOULD volunteer for worthwhile events and things...really.

JGH said...

When you find yourself paying a babysitter to volunteer, you know it's gone WAY too far!