Saturday, April 2, 2011

Freshman Orientation

“I swear to god if you make this meeting a second longer than it has to be by raising your hand, I WILL slap you.” I whisper at Ms. Music Teacher. This is where it gets ugly and a husband has to intervene. Ultimately I win this battle, but only to lose the war because there is a woman with even more esoteric questions sitting just outside my slap zone.

This was parents’ orientation to the high school set in the high schools’ uninspired lunch room.

I am listening to a seemingly endless presentation as I sit with the supermoms. Ms. Music Teacher, decides she wants to ask a question. It is not that I am against questions, but really, why not use a phone or e-mail. “ Let’s be honest—HOW many people have a kid in orchestrate AND band and who also want to sing in the choir—stick a cork in it Ms. Mozart. It is not like you are going to get class participation points.” I tell her in my own sensitive way.
“No…I really feel it is an important question and there may be other parents who have the same question and are afraid to ask.” she insists.

“You should be afraid” I threaten.

Thanks to The Beast and her non-clique personal philosophy—I am familiar with a number of the moms— the artsy, work from home type moms who are writing books or jetting off to photograph a dying population of pray rug weavers in the Himalayas. And also the super moms who are my favorite clique to hang with. They are busy, focused on their careers. I am, of course, not a supermom, but these are my people. These are people who work on the major scientific problems of the day and still have time to remind me to sign The Beast up for kindergarten. These are people who can get 400 kids under the age of ten to sing in-tune and still volunteer, these are people who run Brownie troops and then jet off to Japan for business. And it is not JUST the moms—these are women who managed to balance the art of having a career AND a life. They organize their lives for maximum satisfaction and they get their husbands on board faster than a conductor on a German train.

And these are the moms who ask the questions…lots of questions and I just have to deal with it.


Kathy (p/t writer, f/t mom) said...

ahhhh...those moms. You have much more patience than I! Just attended my 3rd HS orientation, and now my inside thoughts (SHUT THE F UP) have somehow become audible. oops.

JGH said...

I have one thing to say to these moms: watch "Race to Nowhere"! I feel for Ms. Mozart's kid - will they have any down time at all??

LazyMom said...

I love that--"oh did I say that out loud?"

The filters definitely drop with each new school. Politeness goes by the wayside once HS hits. Perhaps it is time to stop going to these little events--I almost always feel it is a lost hour or two of my life.

I have yet to see Race to Nowhere, but since The Beast is not a huge joiner--I think we are okay.